POEMS

A selection of things that I have written.

Is It Hackneyed To Suggest Its Dogfighting For Children?

The Raggedyman, 2023

I crave the title, number one, the finest underneath the sun.
To catch them all is my greatest task, To hold them all within in my grasp.

Journeying through lands far and wide, hunting new companions with skill and pride.
To train each Pokémon I find, help harness their power deep inside.                                                        

Pokémon, oh, the fateful clash, in a world we constantly bash.
Pokémon, oh, fierce and true, our valour shall carry us through.

You teach me, and I'll teach you, yo do whatever I tell you to
Tournaments fought through, one by one, Stalwart, we'll face them, and never run.

 Engaging in duels, challenges we face, Unyielding strength, plus honour and grace.
When the moment arrives to take a stand, Fearless, evolved, I’ll choose you to command.

Pokémon, oh, the glorious clash, through this world we violently slash.
Pokémon, oh, battered and bruised. Poke Centre points will be accrued.

Pokémon, ally of mine, To catch you was a bloody swine.
Poké chum, our bond never fails, A poke ball, it is your jail.

 A World of dreams and adventures unfolds. Through conquests and battles, brave and bold.
A hundred opponents, faced one by one, After each match, you heal up the fun.

 Pokémon, oh battle rages day and night, To be your master, my delight
Pokémon, my every whim you abide I’m sure you love it, deep inside…

 The Akira Horror Picture Show

(The Raggedyman, 2023)
Act 1
Tetsuo
Kanada
Tetsuo
Kanada
Tetsuo
Kanada
Akira
VROOM!!

Act 2
Tetsuo
Kanada
Kiyoko
Takashi
Masaru
Miyako
Tetsuo
Kanada
Akira
WHO??

Act 3
Tetsuo
Kanada
Tetsuo
Kanada
Espers Induced
Dimensional Singularity
Akira
Kanada
Tetsuo
WHAT!?!?

 Goku International

(with apologies to Sir John Cooper Clarke, 2023)

Outside the take-away, Saturday night
A coiffed adolescent, asks me out for a fight
He was no bigger than a sen-zu bean fart
He was a deft exponent of the Sai-yan arts

He gave me three warnings, Trod on me toes
Stuck his fingers in my eyes And kai blasted me in the nose
A kaio-ken made me eyes explode
My head went dead, I fell in the road

I pleaded for mercy, I wriggled on the ground
He spirit bombed my balls and a recap he did expound
Gave my face the Ultra Instinct tread.
Inhaled my kebab and left me for dead

 Through rivers of blood and dragon fisted bones
I crawled half a mile to the public telephone
Pulled Krillin out the call box, held back the bile
And with a broken index finger, I proceeded to dial

I couldn't get an ambulance
The call didn’t go through
The receiver fell in half
It had been kame-hame-hued

A wandering Numekian opened up the door
Demanding information about the baldy on the floor
He looked like he’d come from Ji-Go-ku
He asked "What's all this then and “did Vageta send you?”

He wore a weighted jacket, He was green and zen
He finished his narration and he beat me up again

Thanks to that student of Master Roshi
I'm a shadow of the person that I used to be
I can't go back to Central City
The Z Fighters, for me they’ve got a plan
Enter the Dragonballs?
Exit Raggedyman